Journey out of Depression

Part 2 (Part 1)

When the human spirit is suppressed:

The first part of this article addressed the backround to the different forms of depression and explained the connections on the physical, mental and spiritual levels. It touched upon the distress and great sense of helplessness of those in close contact with sufferers. It sketched in broad outlines the directions in which help can begin. The cry for help of those afflicted is a challenge to us all. It demands our understanding, our respect for the suffering, and our humane and therapeutic support. Based on her personal experience as a therapist and her insights into spiritual connections Susanne Barknowitz shares with us examples of her practical approach. She shows new lively ways of assistance.

We should understand that there are limits to uncovering the root causes of depression, because it is not possible to survey all the spiritual, mental and physical processes. The causes of an illness are often elusive. We should guard against making summary assumptions or interpretations.

In the Grail Message of Abd-ru-shin we find the following hint as a starting point of help: "The true physician of the soul does not need to tear down. He recognises the slumbering good qualities, awakens them and then build upon them. The true principle brings about a transformation of wrong desires through a spiritual understanding!".

The way forward is to awaken the spiritual abilities of a human being who is mentally ill. These abilites are frequently lying dormant, buried, barely reachable or undeveloped. They may be awakened by gradually instilling courage into the person to begin with small steps, by reviving his zest and longing for growth, by showing him confidence and working with him in discovering the path ahead. Many years ago a young man in his twenties came to my practice, silent and totally withdrawn. He stared rigidly in front of him, his face expressionless. He did not even raise his eyes when I spoke to him. I asked why he had come. In an apathetic tone he recounted the development of his illness. After the final exams at school he felt an enormous pressure in his head, a total inability to do anything with his life and a refusal to leave home. He grew into such a confused and desperate state that he had to be hospitalised in a psychiatric clinic. Diagnosis: Endogenous depression and compulsive thought.

I should add here that today it is no longer possible to classify forms of depression so unambiguosly- they are intermingled and show an individual profile. I would also view the former diagnosis "endogenous= incurable" with caution. Every therapist, everyone willing to help, is called upon to give of his best. When and whether any help and healing can actually be given lies not in our hands but in a Higher Hand.

The patient in the meanwhile had begun a study of biology and ecology, interrupted by various stays in the clinic. He was a very good student with the highest , almost superhuman standarts of achievement, which exerted such sustained pressure on him that he was not able to sit his final examination.

He was also in regular psycho-therapeutic treatment and recounted to me, without any deep interest and just as he heard them, all the espoused causes of his illness: overpowering father figure, Oedipus complex, castration complex and a lot more.
I listened to him patiently until he came to the end of his explanation. Then I asked whether this analytic knowledge of his symptoms had been any sort of help to him. He said no. I said that it seemed to me as though his brain, his thoughts pressed heavily on him, but that deep inside something was stirring, which was desperately longing to live but was prevented from doing so. At that point he looked up for the first time. " Yes. That is what I want. I want to live". Only when he said that did I know that I had really reached him.

He came from time to time for therapy; we worked among other things on a form of physical therapy to relieve the pressure in his head. When he was reachable, one could feel his great love for nature, which was also what spurred his choice of study. I encouraged him to go outdoors whenever he felt the pressure, not to analyse the trees according to their variety and species but rather to see and feel them.
Although he still had depressive phases on occasions, he was able to finish his studies and, in the meantime with the help of colleagues, has founded a nature centre offering guided tours to schools and other enthusiasts. This draws genuinely good abilities from him to engagement.

He recently visited me after a very severe episode and I was able to recommend a capable psychiatrist who could put him on balanced medication. I asked him what had sustained him during this very difficult time, for he really had to wrestle with life. I was shaken by his reply: " My love for butterflies" and by the fact that in this big, rough and almost uncouth man, such tenderness was hidden.
Here was a human being who, in spite of the limitation of severe illness, had given room to the longing for life. In that moment can the helpful radiation, which pulsates through the entire Creation, touch him and he receives strength to overcome his burdens. This dedication to something or someone- love- is the greatest power to overcome depression, because it is able from within, from the spiritual, to break through that prison wall. With this knowledge, the difficult, dark phases are easier to endure and to get through. Another client suffers from recurring episodes of endogenous depression, a man about 50 years old who was accustomed from youth to these bouts. He is still withdrawn from the world, is entombed and avoids contact wherever possible. He lives with his wife and child and works as director of an institute. He continues working the best he can during the difficult times while his family must often bear his constant carping and morbid discontent, negative feelings and occasional aggressiveness. In his case an adjustment to medication brought a real improvement. During the healthy phases, when his inner self could be reached, we could work out many things, especially how, step by step, he could gradually conduct his own life as he wished, but in a way that is realistically achievable.

In his job he once faced a task that scared him intensely. He was to arrange a big festive party at the institute on the occasion of his boss`s 75th birthday. This was to include a number of lectures and to last for several days. He wanted to think up an excuse why he could not perform the task, because he was certain that it was beyond his abilties. From what he said I realised that he was actually very fond of his boss. So I put it to him that it was possible to carry through by using his abilities as a token of affection towards his boss, offering his effort as a gift, so to speak. "If you can overcome your reluctance to do that", was my opinion, "you will forget yourself and your weaknesses and then you will succeed". And that is how it happened. Added to which there was a great inner gain, to have given a present to someone and at the same time to have mastered a task successfully.

The noted psychologist Victor Frankl often pointed out that happiness, joy and success are only side effects. We cannot aim for or compel them to appear; rather, they just surface as an unexpected gift whenever we show absolute commitment to a human being, to a cause or to a task.

The first part of this article touched upon what Frankl termed noögenic depression (nous=spirit), the incidence of which has seen a dramatic increase in recent years. This is "the spiritual frustration of a human being who despairs because he is not living according to his true", essential and very own nature, who consequently suffers from total emptiness of his life and does not satisfy the longing of his spirit for meaningful fulfilment.

We human spirits need a sense of purpose. The longing frequently manifests in an inner restlessness which is often misunderstood or distorted and through some external gratification can lead to an addiction. Let us heed this unrest and see in it an expression of our inner voice, which reveals that our spirit is crying out and seeking the fulfilment of purpose and reconnection with a Higher Will! " You earthman are in this Creation to find happiness! In the Living Language which God speaks to you! And to understand this Language, to learn it, and to sense inwardly the Will of God in it, that is your goal during your journey through Creation. In Creation itself to which you belong, lies the explanation of the purpose of your existence, and at the same time also the recognition of your goal. In no other way can you find either.

"This demands of you that you live Creation. But you are only able to live or experience it when you really know it" says the Grail Message.

Elisabeth Lukas (student and successor of Victor Frankl) expresses something similar: " Initially there is an intense desire to gain an understanding not only of Creation but also of our part in it, to uncover the spirit spark within and by so doing to fulfil the purpose of our existence".

This purpose will differ for each person, for no one can determine the purpose of anothers life. Neither can the therapist prescribe meaning or purpose to the patient, but he can encourage and accompany him to find his inner self, taking into account his symptoms and latent abilites. The only path to be followed in seeking the purpose of his life lies deep in the soul of each individual human being. This search for pupose is always to be found in the present, at this actual moment.

Crisis of purpose, spiritual frustration that leads to depression; these are often attended by neurotic trends. Here is an example from the practice:

A patient in her early forties suffers from a variety of anxieties, dissatisfaction, restlessness, depression and a catalogue of physical symptoms such as chest tightness, breathing difficulties, and so on. On enquiry it seems that she has an abundance of everything: an apartment that was a gift from her parents, an understanding husband and happy children, a secure long-cherished occupation as a teacher, parents who look after her children. One could say she has everything that she could wish for. Yet she is dissatisfied and feels her life empty. But a human being is not alone in this world, and his own well-being cannot be his only purpose in life.

This patient suffers from a deflation of meaning and purpose, a so-called "existential vacuum" according to Frankl (Victor Frankl Man`s search for meaning). Nothing is of particular interest to her outside her own well-being. Anything or anyone that does not support this well-being is rejected and perceived as an excessive demand. Even the one area of fulfilment so far, the school, in which she could forget herself to a large extent, is slowly swallowed by this vacuum. Up to now it was possible for her to avoid all unpleasant demands, a lot of which could be off-loaded to others and so live in a protective zone, but only unhappily. Increasing avoidance and the lack of challenge is weakening.

She mentioned the other day that she would prefer to drop everything, leave husband and children and live completely on her own; just to be free at last. Can freedom be achieved like this? Never, because freedom must relate to something or someone. She is only binding and restricting herself, because she concentrates only on herself and her own well-being.
I asked what her reaction would be if her husband came home that very day and told her he was leaving home because staying with her was no longer bearable. Now the world suddenly would look very different and she would begin to realise that there are values that are important in her life, although until now she had been blind to them because she was intent only on satisfying her own needs. I put to her the possiblity that her husband cartainly could leave her one day because he also perceives that the relationship has become empty and lifeless. Any relationship is like a plant; it needs watering and the radiance of light, otherwise it withers away. Therein we found for her that definite purpose of life for which she was prepared to take action.

One last example: A woman in her mid-thirties, married, two children, employed, who has been a patient for nine months. When she came to see me she was depressed and without drive. Her entire life she had followed the decisions of others. At age 20 she had become pregnant and according to custom had married the father of her child. Her father had forbidden her to pursue her preferred occupation, so she followed the career path of his choice. And on it went; she did everything that was expected of her, a stranger to her own decision-making and control of her own life. She put the blame for her present situation on circumstances. I had to explain her own contribution to the circumstances in the fact that she allowed others to make decisions on her behalf. She had indulged a great aberration: External influences, the so-called "super-ego", had taken the place of conscience. She was no longer able to perceive the inner voice as an instrument of the spirit which grounds us in certainty.

We were agreed that she had to begin to find and follow her own path, wherever it took her. Over and over again she said "I do not know what I feel, I feel nothing". This case, too, exemplified that belief in a person`s inner abilities can awaken them.
The marriage had faltered for a number of years. She was dissatisfied that she could not really come to an understanding with her husband. He wanted more from her than she was able to give. She had been unsuccessful in trying to change the situation. But one night she reached the point where she could take a more detached view of her relationship with her husband. The basis of their marriage had been the great sensing of a mutual need, each for the other. She felt great gratitude to her husband for standing by her so steadily. But she also realised that she neither loved him then nor ever did. After all these years and unconscious presentiment grew into a certainty. Suddenly she was able to face this truth and identify with it without putting the blame on herself. She was relieved. In spite of the difficult situation, her zest is freed again; she became unburdened and more active. At the right moment she spoke to her husband, expressed her gratitude and also the importance of her connection with him. He too had subconsciously felt this but did not want to admit it.

As therapists, we are called upon to give to patients, especially those with noögenic depression, a new invitation to become real human beings. It entails giving the patient courage to make a start, to get under way; motivating him to take a look at all possiblities, and awakening his confidence to believe in himself, to realise that he is capable of doing it.

Susanne BARKNOWITZ

Part 1 available here.